Where are you God?

         Where are you God? I find myself asking that question a lot these days only to find my answer months later when I look back on my life and really see everything he has done. You see this year has been different. Ive lost friends and gained them. Ive had to make adult decisions. Decisions that normally Id have my mom make. (That's all in the process of being a senior and growing up). There have been situations and relationships I have prayed about only to receive what I thought was no answer. If you've ever gone from a time in your life where God was pouring so heavily into your life to where you feel like you are digging and digging for an answer to only find "nothing" you can understand my frustration. Its taken me till now to know my answer.
          As I look back over my senior year I see where God has protected me, provided for me, encouraged me, and loved me when I needed it most. Ive also grown to understand that this point in time of my life God is letting me chose. He has taught me and grown me so much now that He wants me to use what I have learned over the last 4 years to make decisions. Our spirituality is like a sponge. Ive been poured into so much that Im "full". Now hes letting take a step out to pour into others and into my own life.
         It makes me think of how my parents are having to give me more trust and less boundaries now because Im going off to college. They have taught me so much and raised me over the past 18 years that now they are going to have to let me go and hope it sticks. It hasnt been that God wasnt giving me answers. It was the fact that I knew the standards he has called me too and I know the next step of his will for my life so If it doesn't follow that I shouldnt commit to it. How stupid of me to constantly ask God the same questions over and over when I found my answer years ago.
         So, If you are struggling with a "dark" time in your walk have no fear God is here. Maybe he is just allowing you to act on what he has already taught you. Dont wait a whole year to figure it out like I did.